Wednesday, 21 April 2010

My new Cosmo still isn't here. I know there is a new one, I've seen it in stores, but I'd feel dumb buying it in a store when I have a subscription. But I feel like harshly mocking someone who's obviously wrong... hm... Cosmo website is slow... Satoshi Kanazawa doesn't post very fast and right now he's onto describing the obviously ancient evolutionary divide between liberals and conservatives... I've lost all interest in Twisty Faster... ooh! PUAs! The well of crazy that never runs dry!

Bear in mind, I'm lazy. I don't have the time or inclination to comb through hundreds of posts from dozens of forums to find the few stupid statements in an otherwise reasonable community. No, these are just from the top few posts in the "Beginner" forum at "Fast Seduction." I didn't even hit "next page."

I was talking with a couple of guys and girls and suddenly I said to one of the girls (it was the first thing i said to her).
"Your mother smells like a pigeon". she didn't respond.
About half an hour later, she asked me if i wanted to searsh for a toilet with her (we were in a park). And the rest is rock and roll history.

I... wow, gosh, I don't even... what does a pigeon smell like, anyway?

When I open groups of girls who don't respond well to my approach, I've found that a common line they use is "We're not interested" and they'll return to their little huddle.
Since it's common enough among the negative responses, I'd like to know if you have any responses for this. I'm assuming that line is a shit test, and they're really hoping you'll overcome the test and show yourself to be the attractive guy they're filtering for.

A woman said "no," can you please explain to me why this really meant "yes"?

How do you know who's a slut? here's a quick guide:
1. Reach hand down pants.
2. If she has a pussy, she's a slut.

Women are horrible hateful things, and I just wish I could have one.

[Q: A girl was supposed to meet me but flaked out, and this bothers me.]
[A:] WRONG, if you are still thinking about her, she has achieved her goal of getting you emotionally invested in her.

Yeah, because when I don't meet guys and don't talk to them, I'm trying really hard to get them invested. (And their obsession with me is thus my fault.)

Ive already gotten the name of this HB7 that works in a record store (bought a couple of CDs in the process) and now i need some ideas on how do i go back in and #close her.
Wow. You got her name. That's some serious progress bro, it means she's dripping for it, better seize that opening. ...Was she wearing a nametag by any chance?

I chatted up this one girl who was selling those heat pad things. We were talking bout it. The whole conversation was fairly playful. I brought up how I could use it after a work out. She gave no compliment even tho I was peacocking my pecs and biceps. Made her laugh about how she knows nothing about how these things work. Conversation was very fluid, up until I ran out of stuff to say...
She was very intent on talking about nothing other than the pad thing she's selling. I need to figure out how to transition from talking bout the crap they're selling to personal stuff.

She's a salesperson. Of course she'll talk to you; she has to talk to you as long as you're keeping up some slight pretense that you're talking about the product. But if every time you try to pry into her personal life she goes "um, yeah, so another thing you can use the heating pad for is...", this is not your failure in technique, this is a very clear message she's sending you.

Never try to logically or through verbal communication make woman to change. Doesn't work at all. Women thought by actions only.
Woman not thought logically or verbally this anyway, that's for damn sure.



And that's the end of the page. That's the end of ONE RANDOM PAGE on a PUA site. What I'd find if I actually went looking for bad stuff is presumably beyond my worst nightmares.

The theme that stands out the most, interestingly, is not manipulation or even straight-up misogyny, but an absolute inability to hear "no." You'd think, with their emphasis on doing a lot of approaches and not getting attached, PUA doctrine would be to instantly accept a "no" as "your loss, toots" and move on, but these guys twist themselves in knots to explain why "no" means they're getting there, they just need to try harder! I hate to use the phrase "rape culture," I think it's usually applied ridiculously, but... if a guy thinks that not calling him means you want him to fall in love, what do you think he'll interpret "no, I'm not ready for sex now" as?

And the really depressing thing, which I haven't mentioned in the quotes, is the age range of the posters. Some are older guys in their 50s, a lot are in college or the post-college drift, but a dispiriting number identify themselves as high school boys. I guess it's not uncommon for guys to go through a phase where sexual frustration manifests as misogyny, and hopefully these are the guys with the best chance of growing out of it and moving on, but I worry that overexposure to PUA will freeze them in this state. Constant othering of women and reinforcement of the messages "it's not her choice, it's your game," and "when you feel bad it's the woman fucking with you" seems like it could really mess with the head of someone too young to have real-life perspective.

I wish I had some way to talk to them. I really want to make these guys understand how and why to act like goddamn humans, and it frustrates me that I have no means of doing so.

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