Nein! Ja! ...Guten Tag?

I'm going to Hamburg, Germany for the next two weeks to visit my dad. Leaving Monday, back on the 29th. Which is awesome, albeit sort of crazy because there was really short notice and I'm still not settled in to the first unfamiliar city where they speak an unfamiliar language. It's a little frightening that I don't speak any German; my dad assures me that a lot of Germans know English, so... thank God for cultural hegemony, I guess.

Well, that's two weeks I won't have to be worried about getting laid, I guess. Phooey. I mean, anything's possible when you're a wide-eyed American abroad going "oh ja, I always wanted to learn a foreign tongue", but there's the Dad Factor. I'm going to be staying in his apartment and pretty much with him the whole time, which is a fairly major cockblock.

I guess that means I should totally try and get laid today. It might be my last chance! Why am I still sitting here in my pajamas? (Because pajamas are comfy! Why can't comfort be sexy? I want to go out to a sleazy bar in my jammies and have guys say "well, looks like you're ready for bed.")

Anyway, I'll take my laptop and probably post from Deutschland, but I don't know if there will be impediments.

It's too bad it'll be cold there, I understand in the summer you can run around parks and beaches in the nakey in Europe. And they have naked advertisements! Especially boobs, maybe not so much crotch, but I understand they're very relaxed about boobs over there.

Europe! Exciting! Kind of insane right now! But I think it'll be awesome! Maybe I can wear my pajamas there!

Ich will Sex wie ein verrückter Affe haben...



P.S.: Oh my. I just read a webpage on cultural advice for Americans in Germany and it specifically mentioned "don't make any Nazi jokes." Yeah... I kinda figured. (It's double funny because I'm Jewish. Awkward...)