Fast Seduction!

Thank God that stupid holiday is over with, now I can go out by myself without having to think "dammit, I'm going out by myself on Valentine's Day." 80% of my friends are coupled up and I'm sleeping with (and thus afraid to do potentially-coupley things with) another 10%, so I basically hid under a rock today.


Also frequently found under rocks are the fine men of the "Seduction Community." Let's check out their awesome website!

Cripes, this thing is huge. I guess the writers have plenty of spare time. I'll click around a bit at random.

Don't introduce [this site] to anyone unless you know they are seeking to improve the same things as you. Why? Because through years of witnessing guys try to introduce this site to their AFC [Average Frustrated Chump] friends, the primary reactions of those friends have been negative because, until somebody understands this site or what it's about, their ingrained societal beliefs simply overpower them.
I need to use this tactic more often. "Now, I may seem like a jerk, but that's just your societal conditioning--I'm really a beautiful humanitarian, you just can't see it!"

If she asks me a question about my family, I will IGNORE the question, but... and this is key... I will respond with something charming or a compliment. Some examples, most of which I've already used this week:
HB [Hot Babe]: So Joseph how many brothers and sisters do you have?
J: You know... I am just really admiring that dress you're wearing, that's really hot!
So, uh... did you lose your whole family in some buzzkillingly tragic incident, or are you just being a dick? Also, your tactic might be ineffective on women who haven't suffered major brain injury.

HB: What do you think about the economic crisis?
J: Why do you like/love me so much?
Too taken aback to even answer with a comeback, the HB muttered something about "stuff to do" and had a security guard walk her to her car.

HB: I am mad at you! You were supposed to call me!
J: Look, come here and give me a kiss and all will be forgiven
HB: NO! I am mad at YOU!
J: Come to daddy, it's ok, I ain't mad atcha! C'mere, gimme a kiss, I forgive you
Am I the only one who gets an "or you'll get the belt again" vibe from J's dialogue here? She answers "No, I'm still mad and you're not answering me like an adult," and he rejoinders the only way he knows how.

Browsing through this site, 90% of PUA scenarios describe the same dynamic: women want to deny you sex, and to get laid, you have to beat them at the game. Let's check out some selections from the glossary!

Anti-Slut Defense. The chick logic a woman (especially younger ones) will go through to relieve the guilt having sex too quickly with a man, assuming she has enough time to "think" about the consequences - a reaction which causes them to come up with objections or reasons that they shouldn't fuck you in order to relieve their guilt of taking *responsibility* for doing something that society would often call "slutty".
Yes, she isn't having second thoughts about fucking you, that's unpossible, she's only worried about that goshdarn society!

bitch shield: Not a derogatory term - used to describe a behavior women use when attempting to fend of would-be suitors.
Wow, I'm glad you clarified that, because otherwise calling women "bitches" for not fucking you might've sounded a little derogatory.

Display High Value (action/verb) or Display(s) of High(er) Value. An action or story which increases your perceived value. Can be used positively or negatively depending on your perceived value prior to the DHV and whether the chick is Lower Value (you increase hers or reduce yours, preferably increase hers) or Higher Value (you increase yours or reduce hers, preferably increase yours).
In other words, it's 2d20 minus THAC0, less armor value and increased by weapon damage and any enchantments currently on the target. Tap three Swamps.

There's a whole system here wherein you work out the woman's mathematical value from 0-10 and then do a variety of similarly numerical maneuvers on her. Man, it's gotta be a letdown every time you win mathematically and still don't get fucked. "No, no, you don't understand, my score is ahead of yours by eleven points, you need to take your bra off now!"

The main feature of the site is the supermassive Player's Guide, which is chockablock with oh what the fuck is this.

Me : Hey Alicia. What do you love to eat ? Something that really makes you salivate just by thinking of it ?
Alicia : Oh... I love fresh ripe mangoes from Hawaii / strawberries from Ohio... oh yes...
Me: Ripe mangoes huh? Mmmm....that's yummy. I don't know if you can IMAGINE... SUCKING into one sweet, delicious, juicy mango NOW... mmm... can you taste the sweetness of the mango... swishing INSIDE YOUR MOUTH... mmm... soo tasty... doesn't that give you lots of pleasure and ha-PENIS just thinking about that? Mmm... I bet, if there were a mango here NOW, you'd WANT IT IN YOUR MOUTH (point to dickee!).
If I got him on tape saying this, no jury would convict me for anything I did to him after that point.

Yeah, I can totally hear/feel/see what you mean. Isn't it just great how the things in life that just sneak up behind you unexpectedly? I mean, there are things you know are coming and you can see them, like, "Oh, it's Friday, I'm getting paid today." Now that's in front of you, in your future, but then the best things in life, the ones that can make you FEEL FULFILLED and FEEL SO GOOD FROM YOUR BOTTOM to your top have a tendency to sneak up behind you and COME FROM YOUR REAR. And INSIDE YOU ASS yourself, "This is so great! How can something this great (point to schlong) just take me from behind and surprise me like this?" I mean, that facinates me, take a second and think about how the greatest things (point to schlong) you have ever felt took you from the rear...think about that. It's sexually facinating if you really THINK ABOUT IT and TAKE IT ALL IN ANALlytically.
You know what else in interesting? Is how simple words that I say can make you feel so good. (remember you have been SSing her for a while by now). It's like you feel these things (point to schlong) COMING IN YOUR REAR, ENTERING YOUR REAR, being whispered to you, and it can make you feel so good. Don't you find that when I talk like that, when I DO IT, you can't resist and you just OPEN YOUR REAR and LET IT SLIDE INSIDE YOU, hearing those words and feeling so wonderful?
Shit, I just Maced my monitor.