Sally.

Sally, my sweet little guinea pig of six years, died this morning. I was lucky enough to be with her when it happened. She was very peacef...

"Sheesh... men! Am I right, ladies?"

By popular request (one person is "popular" around here), I will point out the thuddingly obvious: this Good Housekeeping articl...

Dude.

When I was a kid, I thought I wanted to be a boy. But I understand now that I didn't really, not penis and all. What I really wanted w...

Unfeasible.

When I was old enough to be horny but too young to fully understand how these things worked, I had a recurrent sexual fantasy of coupling up...

Not bad for starters.

Ten yards.

T9.

After paperwork and waiting period and "getting the money together while still eating regularly" period, I finally have my pretty!...

Missed opportunity.

Back when I had short hair and a defiantly unattractive fashion sense (as opposed to now when it's just accidental...), people asked me ...

How to have terrible sex.

The key component is some measure of psychological reluctance or indifference. We'd previously agreed that we'd fuck on Saturday, b...

Risk/Reward Hierarchy.

High risk/high reward Gorgeous (oblivious) stranger Cute single coworker who keeps sending severely mixed messages but could create a horrib...

The only thing you really need to know about PUA.

This man claims to be an expert on attracting women. He has carefully dressed and accessorized himself in the way he feels to be most condu...

Fast Seduction!

Thank God that stupid holiday is over with, now I can go out by myself without having to think "dammit, I'm going out by myself on ...

Words I have a problem with.

Cum: It's come . Sperm: It's a complex mixture primarily composed of fluids, proteins, and sugars from the seminal vesicles and p...

Observation.

My entire dating history seems to be colored with unreasonable paranoia of "going too fast," to the point where I'll date a gu...

Why You Aren't Getting Laid.

This post is for all the men out there who wail to the heavens that they're not getting laid and it isn't faaaaaiiiir. (Okay, it...

OkDammit.

Welp, I re-registered for OkCupid, because what's the worst that could happen. (I'm not saying the profile name here, because these...

Turn-off.

You know, I think of myself as fairly open-minded, but I absolutely cannot conceive of a relationship with anyone who spells "you"...

Cosmocking: March '09!

All righty! Marissa Miller on the cover! "SEX" also on the cover, in two-inch letters, because this is one classy rag! Man, I do...

Mountain.

I'd kinda planned to go to a munch today. A different one, a TNG ("the next generation", i.e., under 35, and you would not be...

Dry.

Add to my list of Underappreciated Sex Acts: dry humping! (Also to my list of poorly named sex acts. I guess Soggy Humping was a little to...

AUGH I CAN'T STOP MYSELF I'M SORRY GUYS.

I don't want to be doing this. I know I'm harping, I know I'm trainwrecking, I know she's just some random crazy, I know I ...

Know your BDSMers.

I just can't stop being intolerant! It's funny too, because I had a really nice day today--I spent most of the day on a long beauti...

PINK!

Ladies and gentleman, by popular demand, a pink Sig Sauer.

Twisty Faster Is Fucking Insane.

Okay, I think this needs to be a recurring feature. Like Cosmocking! I never could resist a good fish in a barrel. The funny thing about Tw...

More Surgery.

Last night after the Superbowl I went over to Surgery's place after all. And we fucked like bunnies in bunny season. He hurt me! A lit...

*sulk*

I would be tangled up with a naked Surgery right now if not for the frickin' Superbowl. Stupid football. :p