Why I want to fuck my boyfriend up the ass.

Because he enthusiastically consents to it, yeah yeah, and because it's a morally neutral act that carries no shame, sure sure, of course. But these are only reasons not to not do it. Let's talk about why I want to do it.

I want to do it because I love my boyfriend's butt. I love my boyfriend, much more--but I love his butt in a completely separate way. Frankly, my relationship with my boyfriend and his butt is nearly polyamory. Rowdy has an exceptional butt, a truly world-class ass, round and strong and smooth, and it's a joy just to touch. To outright fuck it, to have that amazing ass tightening beneath me and that smooth skin pressing against my groin, would satisfy a primal lust for a thing of beauty.

I want to do it because it fucks around with gender. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but I'm not very comfortable with being a girl? I love the feeling of having a cock. Obviously I can't feel it exactly (although with the base right up against my clit, quite a bit of sensation gets through), but I love having my cock stroked and sucked. And fucked. It's the thrill of sex mixed with the thrill of violating gender roles, and that's a lot of thrill right there. (I'd have to ask my boyfriend to get his perspective on this, but I don't think of it as making him more feminine. I want to look down and watch a man get fucked.)

I want to do it because it could hurt him. Not that I would! Psychologically, I can't. I've tried to hit him several times (with his agreement and encouragement), and the relevant Batman sound effect is not "bam" but "piff." I can't bring myself to do it. Nor could I bring myself to cause him pain by fucking his ass, but the fact that I could is powerful. It means that I have to be conscious of myself during sex, be responsible rather than impulsive in my actions, and be highly, highly sensitive to his reactions. I'm usually pretty uninhibited, so that's a new way for me to experience sex. It's also sexy as hell to have someone at my mercy because I am inside his body.

I want to do it because it turns me the fuck on for reasons I can't even elaborate here because I don't understand them myself. I want to do it because thinking about it gets me wet and squirming. I want to do it because I've had dreams about it. I want to do it because every time I've played with a man's ass is a crystal clear and thrilling memory in my mind. I want to do it because it's fucking hot and hotness is a thing unto itself.

I want to do it because umf. Yeah.