"Double Your Dating."

Sorry for going postless, I've been busy with some major life and job rearrangements. But Bruno just sent me a wonderful booklet on how any guy can learn the secrets to "getting" lots of women, and I figured that was worth a post. (Do most guys really want a large number of women? Seems like one or two attractive ones on a recurrent basis would be more satisfying. But maybe I just don't understand because I'm a girl.)

Anyway, damned if I'm going to read 90 pages of this shit, but the general gist is that women need to be tricked into "giving up" affection and sex and being a manipulative little weaselboy is the height of studliness. Implicit in this, of course, is what Figleaf would call "the no-sex class"--the ridiculous belief that women don't want sex for the same regular horny reasons as men, and therefore will only have sex if tricked or somehow paid. I've heard variations of this belief in a million places and it always drives me insane, because, well, I'm really horny. And of course I'm not horny for all people or at all times, but when I'm not, payment won't help. Pay me enough and I'll fake it, but I cannot be paid or tricked into feeling horny.

But why make fun of the underlying assumption when there's so much to be made fun of in the book?

For most men, a woman is like a Chinese puzzle inside of a brain twister.
Really? Because I feel like I'm just a person. It's not like my actions are apparently-random, is it? I... do things that are fun and avoid things that suck. It's very unmysterious. And I feel like that when guys say "women are a mystery" what they really mean is either "making women have sex with me is a mystery" or just "women are crazy."

Have you ever listened to a group of women talking about men? Ever notice how they speak largely in some kind of code language and constantly make a big deal out of tiny details that seem totally irrelevant? Have you ever noticed, on the other hand, how men are direct with each other and have no interest in bickering over small things? What's going on? Have you ever noticed how attracted to drama most women are?
Nope! I never noticed any of those fucking things! And I don't understand how you can write a book on attracting women from a perspective of hating women. If they're that damn crazy, why do you even want one?

One good example is to say to a hot woman who's acting arrogant "You don't have me fooled for a minute, dear." When she say's "What are you talking about?" you say "Well, I know that most men fall for this 'I'm beautiful and aloof and I get my way' part of your personality... but I know something that none of them know... that there's really another side of you. A side that none of THEM get to see. I'll bet you a dollar right now that I know something about you that no one who's only known you for 5 minutes has EVER known... ... You may act tough, but you're actually EXTREMELY sensitive on the inside. If someone makes a negative comment to you, you might act like it doesn't bother you... but you'll think about it all the way home... I know that secretly you're as sensitive as a little girl... it's just that most people never get to meet that part of you..." This messes up a cold woman soooo hard that you have to be ready for instant personality meltdown and a completely different person to come out of her.
Oh MAN. I would love to see a guy actually go through with this routine. On the ludicrous offchance that it actually works, do you really want an arrogant woman? (Well, "arrogant" here probably means "not properly sexually available," but let's play along.) Seems like it would be more efficient to just walk away and find a woman who's polite in the first place. Oh wait, then she wouldn't be hot, because all hot chicks are arrogant bitches, I nearly forgot.

Women often view men picking up on them as a sort of game. They talk about it with each other, they have standard lines that they learn when you ask for their number - "Why don't you give me YOUR number instead and I can call you...?" and so on.
That's not a game, that's so your creepy ass doesn't call us 500 times at 3 AM.

I believe that underneath it all, men are usually trying to find women who will give them sex, and women are usually trying to find men who will give them loyalty and commitment.
I believe that's your fundamental problem. It seems like if you really just want sex NO STRINGS NO EMOTIONS AWESOME MAN, you could hire a hooker. So are the pickup games just a cash-saving move?

If she complains about you or doesn’t like something, turn it up a notch and do it more. If she says to me “I don’t really like it when you say that” I say “Well then you might want to leave, because I say it a lot” Get it?
Women: Every Day is Opposite Day! (It isn't Opposite Day.)

I do crazy things, like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar, I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look them right in the eye. Or say “What are you doing at a bar for godsakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face.
Hahahaha Jesus Christ this guy has never had sex in his life.

I could go on, there's 90 pages of this shit, but you get the idea. I think even normal men know that "pick-up magic" is for creepy little trolls, so I guess I'm doing the fish-in-a-barrel thing here, but God is this shit hilarious.

Holly's Two-Step Pick-Up Magic:
1. Say hi to a woman. Talk to her like you'd talk to a human being.
(1a. This will not always work, and not always lead to sexytimes. This is not because you lack some asset or skill, it's because she didn't wanna. Don't take it personally and try again.)
2. Once you've gotten to know her a little better, continue to treat her like a human being. The panties will melt down her leg, I tell ya.